Monday 10 August 2015

Uppi 2 Coaching Classes to start in KG Road

A faking news style piece by me on the much awaited, much hyped film Uppi 2 that stunned everyone with the upside down Cut-out and teaser:

After having realised that there is a huge demand for some explanations on all the confusing terms and posters and cut outs of Upendra's latest film Uppi 2, Mr Venkateshi from Magadi road has come up with a plan to open Uppi 2 coaching classes near Nartaki theatre, Bengaluru. 

"As the film is releasing on Friday, A fresh batch will start this Wednesday", he announced. "After having spoiled the youngsters with all the LKG, UKG, 7th Std, SSLC, PUC, IIT-JEE, IAS and CAT and sundry other coaching classes the time has come for me to enter the film industry", he said. "People are not understanding the screenplays written by these new age film-makers like Rakshith Shetty and good old Upendra, and that causes frustrations", he fumed.

First 2 classes will teach word combinations like Naanu, Neenu, Unknownu, Naanu annonu unknownu, Neenu unknownu annonu, Neenemba naanu, naanemba neenu, neenu kandante naanu, naanu kandante neenu, Avanu kandante naanu mattu neenu and various other permutations and combinations of nouns,pronouns, proper nouns, gerunds, verbs, adverbs, adjectives and every other combination from Wren and Martin Grammar books.

There will be separate classes for those who have just seen the posters, for those who have watched the teasers and for those who have watched the film just once.
"Those who have watched the film more than once will be admitted to a different batch", he promised. A guest lecturer will be taking a session on understanding a film that has a film within a film within a film in a reverse screenplay format happening inside a flashback all the while being a metaphor for a symbolic thing.

A special gym instructor will join to teach people as to how the necks are to be bent for ulta viewing of the upside down shots in the film. Some die-hard fans who were really excited about the "Aham Naaneshwara" chant have enrolled to the Wednesday classes demanding that they want to know what it means.

There will also be special auto rickshaw services to take confused people coming out of the theatres directly to the class where an equally confused teacher will explain the meanings/interpretations and hidden meanings of what they just saw. The autos will be parked just outside the exit gate of Nartaki theatre with the "Excuse me please" sign boards.

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